Another Shitty Week.

waiting for summer

Oh yeah, I didn’t go to weigh-in!

Yeah thats because I’m a loser (and not in a good way) in fact I’m more of a gainer! Crap! No matter how many time I remind myself I always let “Fake Weight Loss” superficially please me. Oh what’s “Fake Weight Loss” you ask? Well basically its a term I made up all on my own, but it’s when you lose weight in a unatural way (natural being basic calories in calories out). There can be many things that cause “Fake Weight Loss” like:

-Abnormally extreme workouts, like climbing a mountain.

-Being stuck somewhere where you can’t eat for a very long time, like out at sea

-Giving Birth…ha!

-Fasting

-Excessive sweating

Or in my case last week, being sick for an entire weekend and chosing to sleep rather than eat. See although I was thrilled to drop 2lbs in a weekend, I should have known it wouldn’t last. Thats the thing about “Fake Weight Loss” it doesn’t last, it always comes back. Lame.

Anyways my “Fake Weight Loss” came back and I’m sitting uncomfortably at least 2lbs higher than last week. Therefore I took the easy way out and skipped my weigh in. I feel really shitty about it, but I just need to get back on track. The bad thing is, I have ZERO motivation. I keep telling myself to go to the gym, to stop eating salt, to not come home from work and sit on my ass for the rest of the night. None of it works.

I was feeling really blue yesterday about my weight, seeing a higher number than I’d seen in a while. Then I was talking to a coworker who told me that Blue Monday the most depressing day of the year had just happened, therefore I’m blaming this lull on the tail ends of that. January just kind of sucks. I’m also soooo done with winter! I’m so sick of the short days and how it’s too cold to be outside. Bleh! I can’t wait until I can go swimming in my pool every day after work, and Mr. Gaunt and I can go for walks and paddle boat! We are even thinking about riding bikes this summer!

So at this point I don’t know how to get my shit together. I really wanted to lose my 75lbs awhile ago, but if I don’t hit it by the end of January I’m gonna cry. Seriously. This has been my worst month yet. Alright I’m off to bed so maybe I wont be quite so tired tomorrow. Let me know if you have any good motivational tips, I could use them.

The Biggest Loser WHAT WHAT!

I so heart The Biggest Loser! I missed two episodes (one being the “where are they now” episode)  so I watched them today, and my lord is that show so so so inspiring! I guess the one thing I struggle with is the working out. 6 months later and 60lbs lost and I STILL have not gotten into a workout routine. Pro who has done this with me the whole time made a comment a few weeks ago “I cant believe you have lost so much weight without really working out!” And I know! Its kind of absurd. Obviously my eating was shit before so just changing my diet has been enough to drop weight, but I want to be physically fit! I look at the Losers from seasons past and they are all so strong and muscular and most of them are now working in the physicall fitness field. Me…nope. I want to be stronger and I want to be able to run, but I suck at it. I dont even really try to put in effort. I fail.

At first I felt like my weight was what was holding me back from working out, thinking if I lost weight working out would be easier. It isnt. It’s just one of those things, like laundry, and money, that I just lack motivation to get done. Ugg.

Im suppose to go to weigh in on Monday night, I would love to minimum lose enough to actually it my 60lbs, but would lov for it to be a little more. Mr. Gaunt rented the new Wii Fit Plus for us to try out (this one will actually tell you how many calories you burn) so maybe I can get back into that. My scale uts me about 11 pounds away from my January 1st goal of losing 75lbs, and I would love love love to see that goal reached on my scale for the new year. I feel like I can make it happen, even if Weight Watchers scale doesnt quite show it. 75lbs lost in 8 months will still be an amazing amount! 100lbs in a year will be even better. I just need to stay focused. I talked to Mr. Gaunt’s mom today about food on Christmas and we both agreed that we will do all healthy stuff for christmas and NO baking! Ha! O enough rambling. I  need to go wash all my dishes!